Category Archives: Personal

So Thankful…

ThanksgivingThis morning we gathered with some other homeschool families to celebrate Thanksgiving, and of course at one point we asked the kids to list the things they were thankful for.  We’d had a hideous morning so far, and my kids’ answers did nothing to improve my mood: toys, cars, chairs, strollers, cups… basically just anything they saw in front of them.  They were just not getting into the mindset we were trying to encourage, and I’m sure I didn’t help the situation, since I’d been in tears several times over the past couple hours and was barely holding myself together to lead the discussion.

However, the experience got me thinking, and as the day progressed I tried to be intentional about focusing on gratitude in the midst of frustrating circumstances.  I am so thankful for these blessings today:

  • my sweet friend who told me not to stress when I realized our celebration started in 10 minutes not in 2 hours
  • our neighbor, herself a busy homeschooling mom of four, who took the time to come jump start my car when the battery was dead for the fourth time in as many weeks, even though she needed to leave herself
  • another dear friend who sent her older kids to whisk my little ones away to the playground and help clean up the mess from my leaky containers of food for our feast
  • multiple friends jumping to take over my clean-up responsibilities when I expressed how overwhelmed I was and just needed to go home
  • A healthy 3-month old who interrupted his nursing just to smile and coo at me when I finally escaped to my bedroom for an hour of peace.  Every day I get teary and praise God for him, remembering his rough beginning and how I longed to hold him while he was getting strong in the NICU.
  • A day at home tomorrow.  The last few days of early holiday celebrations have been too much for this introvert and I am thoroughly “peopled out.”
  • God’s mercies which are new every morning.  There are many moments today that I wish I could take back, but I’ll settle for moving forward and resting in His sweet mercies.

Of course there are so many things I could add, but the important thing isn’t what’s on the list but the simple act of setting aside my tears and frustration to notice even a few of the myriad blessings God pours out on me each day.  Truly, my cup overflows.

Comic Relief for a Frazzled Mom

This morning did not get off to a great start.  The boys had their IEW class at 10, so in addition to the normal morning tasks of trying to get everyone fed and dressed, we were trying to squeeze in a little math, plus they needed to finish their homework before we left.  It soon became obvious that no one else was going to jump on board my efficiency train however, so I found myself dealing with chaos:

  • Ian arguing about wanting to do different math.
  • Arianna battling over my refusal to let her wear a nice church dress to her class because they usually go outside and play in the sand and I didn’t want it ruined.
  • Both boys rushing off sloppy stick figure sketches instead of doing their best work and then breaking down in tears when I required them to go back and improve their illustrations.
  • Nicholas droning on and on, “Why, Mama?” like a broken record about nothing in particular, not trying to cause trouble but annoying me to no end as I tried to tend to everyone else.
  • And behind it all, the background noise of Nathaniel crying incessantly, mostly because I dared to set him down to fix breakfast, help get people dressed, or change the diaper that I didn’t notice was dirty until I started buckling Nico into his car seat.

Ordinarily I might have just cancelled school for the day, but I didn’t want the boys to miss class, plus we have a birthday and a field trip later this week so we really did need to get something accomplished.  By the time we left the house, I had apologized to at least three children for making them frustrated and for letting my stress get the better of me.

We made it to church (where their writing class is held) and got everyone settled in the appropriate rooms.  I swung by the bookstore/coffee bar on site for an iced mocha and a pecan roll to finish off my breakfast (since chocolate seemed like a necessity at that moment).  Then I popped into the women’s Bible study for a bit of peace while I nursed the baby before joining the boys in their class.  Settling in, I took a deep breath, determined to soak in the quiet of a [mostly] child-free moment, and prepared my heart as my friend Elizabeth opened with a reading from Psalm 56 (NLT).

O God, have mercy on me,
    for people are hounding me.
    My foes attack me all day long.
 I am constantly hounded by those who slander me,
    and many are boldly attacking me…

I almost started laughing out loud as the words made me picture our morning and my children as the “foes.”

I praise God for what he has promised.
    I trust in God, so why should I be afraid?
    What can mere mortals do to me?

They are always twisting what I say;
    they spend their days plotting to harm me.
They come together to spy on me—
    watching my every step, eager to kill me…

Okay, well at least it hasn’t gone that far, I chuckled, feeling slightly guilty that this psalm was striking me as something humorous when there are people in the world facing truly deadly situations.

My enemies will retreat when I call to you for help.
    This I know: God is on my side!
I praise God for what he has promised;
    yes, I praise the Lord for what he has promised.
I trust in God, so why should I be afraid?
    What can mere mortals do to me?

BlessingsFor years, I clung to the promise God had given me in a vision when I was just fifteen, a promise of a husband and children.  I longed for the life I have now and dreamed of getting to spend each day discipling the children He would give me.  So even though I know it’s a gross misinterpretation of this Scripture, the words of the Psalm were a gentle reminder for this frazzled mom that I have so much for which to be thankful.  Even on the stressful days, I want to make sure I am praising God, especially for these five precious blessings, “mere mortals” from whom I have nothing to fear.

I will fulfill my vows to you, O God,
    and will offer a sacrifice of thanks for your help.
For you have rescued me from death;
    you have kept my feet from slipping.
So now I can walk in your presence, O God,
    in your life-giving light.

Oh, let it be so, dear Lord.  Thank you for making me smile in the midst of my stress and for the reminder to turn my eyes upon you so that I can bask in the glory of your “life-giving light.”

Our First Week With Five

We just wrapped up our first week with all five kids at home, and it didn’t exactly go as I expected.  Nathaniel lost a little weight after first coming home from the NICU, so my top priority became trying to nurse him as much as I could.  However, I hadn’t anticipated the depth of everyone’s enthusiasm over having a new baby, and the love pouring out of the older children was overwhelming at times (if not for Nathaniel, then at least for me).  I found myself locking my bedroom door several times a day to catch a peaceful few moments alone with my wee one to nurse without having everyone else climbing on top of us trying to stroke his hair or touch his tiny feet.

Nathaniel Love Collage
In all truth, however, I’m overjoyed that they love him so much.  There’s never a shortage of arms ready to welcome this sweet baby, and my 7-year old is actually incredible helpful when it comes to taking care of him.  I’m finding it hard to imagine going back to school at this point, but I’m hoping that the novelty of the baby will wear off a bit and I won’t constantly be battling to give him a little space or mediate fights about who gets to hold him!

 

Our Newest Addition!

We started out on Monday planning on squeezing in one last week before taking some time off to get ready for our baby in September.  All those plans went out the window when my water broke the day I hit 36 weeks.  Within a few hours, a sweet baby boy was in my arms and my older kids had the week off school!

NathanielIt’s been a bumpy road.  Coming 4 weeks early meant Nathaniel’s lungs were still immature, and within the first hour he was whisked off to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) because he was struggling to breathe normally.  At first we hoped he would only be there for a day or so, but as the week progressed, we experienced a few small setbacks, and today I am heading home without him.

Through it all, the Lord has been our refuge, and He has surrounded us with the love, support, and prayers of friends and family.  I am resting secure in the “peace that passes understanding,” looking forward to the day we can bring Nathaniel home to meet his brothers and sister.  And when I get frustrated that he’s not in my arms, I remind myself that if all had gone according to schedule, he wouldn’t be anyway.  This way I get to heal from my fifth c-section on my own and by the time he gets home I’ll be feeling much better and I’ll be able to focus on this sweet little man.

Jesus Loves Me, This I Know…

I was going to make this a “Wordless Wednesday” post, but I don’t know that I’m capable of refraining from words completely.  I just thought I’d take some time between reviews to share a cute moment from a few days ago.

Nico sings to himself constantly, throwing in the few words he can say and just babbling the rest.  By 18 months he was humming several recognizable tunes, and his repertoire has grown over the last few months.  The other day I heard him singing “Jesus Loves Me,” and when I glanced over at him I realized he had found his great-grandfather’s Bible in a stack of books I was trying to find a place for, and he was sitting there contentedly, flipping through the pages as he sang.

Little ones to Him belong
Little ones to Him belong… Indeed.  This boy just melts my heart on a daily basis!

Celebrating Freedom!

I realize not everyone who reads my blog is in the United States and may not share my joy in celebrating our national independence today, but regardless of nationality, I think we can all appreciate the sacrifice of men and women around the world to attain their freedom.

Liberty is prized, not only by Americans, but by all who realize that God created us to be free.  Imagine what life would have been like if mankind had never rebelled against God.  What glorious freedom there is apart from the power of sin!  What amazing grace that Christ offers to break the bonds of sin!

Stand fast therefore in the liberty by which Christ has made us free, and do not be entangled again with a yoke of bondage. Galatians 5:1

So whether you join me as an American in remembering God’s blessing upon the founding of a nation that holds liberty in such high esteem, or celebrate as a child of God the freedom we have in Christ, let us never forget that our freedom has been bought with precious blood and is to be cherished and celebrated!

Independence Day

countdown…?

keep-calm-the-countdown-is-onFor the last couple years we’ve started school right after 4th of July.  It meant we had plenty of wiggle room as the school year passed so we could take breaks as needed, and it allowed us to finish early before the end-of-the-year activities made us restless.  But after a long week of unpacking boxes and trying to settle in, I realized that if we stick with that schedule, we’re only a week away from starting back to school!

So are we sticking with the schedule this year?  I’m not quite sure.  We’re already working on some review products, so I’ll be praying about whether or not we should be kicking into high gear next week.

Stay tuned!

Thankful…

Tomorrow’s our big moving day, but since we’re only going a couple miles, we’ve slowly been taking small things over for the the last three days.  I’m anticipating a LONG day tomorrow with no chance for the little ones to get in a decent nap, so rather than waking them up when people come to start loading the truck at 7am, I thought we’d attempt a slumber party at the new house.

So we ordered pizza, watched a movie on my laptop (praise the Lord for successful Internet installation today!), and broke out the sleeping bags.  Nico went down fine in the portable crib in his room (where he’s napped the last two days), and the three older kids and I are crashing in sleeping bags in the living room.  They’re already starting to drift off, but it may be a long night on the floor for this pregnant mama.

My heart is bursting with gratitude…

  • for the blessing of this house
  • for the friends who are sacrificing their Saturday to help us
  • for a strong marriage that’s weathering the stress of moving
  • for the resolution of several minor health issues that popped up in the last week
  • for the precious children sleeping next to me tonight
  • and especially for the Lord’s indescribable love and the grace He pours out upon us each day.

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Almost there…

Today was the day we originally were scheduled to move, but circumstances beyond our control required us to postpone it another week.  I was frustrated by the delay at first, but having a little extra time did allow me a bit of much needed breathing room this week.  This afternoon I packed up my last box of books.

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I can’t decide whether this sight is depressing because the shelves look so empty, or hopeful because I know they’ll filled again someday soon.  (Though I must admit, the exhaustion of packing has made me feel like I need a few months off before I unpack.  I’m hoping my nesting instinct kicks in soon so that at least most of it gets done before the baby arrives in September.)

I am so thankful for the blessing of our new house, and I know this week will fly by and we’ll be feeling at home before I know it.  Hope you all have a wonderful week!

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